Dos and Don’ts of Petting a Fearful Cat

While you first pictured adopting a cat, you will have had soothing ideas of purr-filled cuddle periods on the sofa. In actuality, your makes an attempt to pet your cat are typically met with scratches, tail swishes, and nips.

Why, oh why, can it’s so arduous to pet some cats? There are a number of causes—some could also be momentary and a few could also be distinctive to your cat. However there are some necessary issues to study your cat that may make it simpler to know the way a lot affection they need and when to present it.

Not All Cats Like Affection

A want for affection typically is determined by the socialization and dealing with your cat skilled as a kitten. Oftentimes we don’t know our cat’s historical past and might’t impression how they have been introduced up previous to adoption day.

If you happen to’re adopting a brand new cat, you’ll be able to ask the adoption middle in the event that they know something about your potential cat’s historical past. Ask if the cat had optimistic dealing with as a kitten or if they’ve been particularly fearful within the shelter. This info might assist you to decide which cat is best for you.

Genetics additionally have an effect on how a lot a cat needs to work together. Some kittens are born to very shy moms who concern folks and this may be handed on to her kittens. Being light and taking issues sluggish is necessary for adopting a shy cat or kitten. One examine confirmed that daring fathers have been extra prone to have daring kittens. These kittens usually tend to be outgoing, adventurous, and fewer scared of interactions with folks.

DO: Discover out about your cat’s historical past when you can. In the event that they’ve been dealt with gently since a younger age, they’re extra prone to take pleasure in petting. And in case your cat has a gregarious dad, they’re extra prone to be outgoing too.

DON’T: Anticipate all cats to have the identical character. Not all cats take pleasure in affection from strangers and even from acquainted folks. Be affected person and take the time to learn the way they wish to work together.

Feline Moods and Wants Can Change



Conduct is influenced by genetic background, earlier experiences, and present circumstances. If a cat is squeezed too tight or is harmed throughout petting, they are going to be nervous and keep away from that state of affairs once more. Repeating this sample is much more prone to end in fearful and aggressive behaviors in cats.

Dealing with cats gently and punctiliously helps us keep away from disagreeable conditions for them. And cats’ moods can change. Typically an affectionate cat may not wish to be petted, identical to we typically don’t care to be touched.

A cat who enjoys being petted is extra prone to strategy, lean into the scratches, and rub scent glands from their face onto your hand. They could present bunting, kneading, and purring. Cats can also flip for lengthy strokes alongside their again or scratches close to the bottom of the tail.

Some cats keep away from human interplay, present nervous conduct, or make aggressive shows. Why? They only don’t wish to snuggle proper now and would reasonably take pleasure in some playtime or loosen up on their very own as a substitute. Components affecting a cat’s present conduct might embody their surroundings, starvation or thirst, sickness or discomfort, or simply being drained and able to sleep.

DO: Take note of your cat’s temper and present wants. Are they leaning into your pets and rubbing in your legs? Or do they scoot additional away every time you pet them?

DON’T: Drive affection onto a cat who clearly doesn’t need it. It will solely trigger them to be extra scared of you approaching sooner or later.

The place to Pet Your Cat

Many cats take pleasure in being petted beneath their chins and in different areas across the face.

Some folks make the error of pondering cats are like canines and luxuriate in any affection they’ll get. Whereas many canines like an excellent stomach rub, for instance, it is off-limits for many cats and should result in bites and swipes.

Cats usually tend to take pleasure in scratches close to the candy spots: below the chin, across the again of the ears, typically the highest of the pinnacle, and lengthy strokes alongside the again of the physique. This doesn’t imply they are going to be snug with simply anybody giving them scratches, simply as we received’t really feel snug being hugged by strangers on the road.

In terms of being held, some cats don’t thoughts being held briefly, others might even prefer it, and a few cats all the time hate to be picked up. You’ll know which sort your cat is—respect your cat’s boundaries.

My cat permits me to select her up, however provided that I maintain her upright. That is the case for a lot of cats—being the wrong way up or having their bellies uncovered is a really weak place for them.

Hearken to Your Cat’s Physique Language

Some cats take pleasure in prolonged cuddle periods and others favor a quick cordial pat. My cat loves affection—however on her phrases solely. She is going to come to take a seat on my lap and I’m allowed to pet her head and again. When she is completed, her tail will flick rapidly and she’s going to give me a glance that claims, “Please cease or put together to be nipped!”

Being attentive to physique language like a stiffened physique, shifting weight away, or a tail starting to twitch tells you that your cat has had sufficient for now. There’s nothing unsuitable with this conduct in any respect. It’s no indication that your cat is imply or doesn’t such as you. Simply tune in to their preferences and your mutual belief will proceed to develop.

DO: Supply scratches across the head, base of the ears, and below the chin. Cease earlier than your cat turns into agitated. Quick and candy is all the time higher than drawn out and aggravated.

DON’T: Assume an aloof cat is a nasty cat—all cats are good cats. Some take time to heat as much as new pals, whereas others are set of their distinctive methods.

Lastly, when you discover a change in your cat’s conduct throughout a petting session, i.e., she often enjoys pats however now seems painful, agitated, or avoids contact, there could also be one thing extra happening, and it is best to get in contact together with your vet.

Additionally Learn: What Your Cat’s Tail Can Inform You